Just Getting Away (ATTN: FAUNAMYTH with SILVER LEAF)

Everything was perfect now, wasn't it? The packs had finally arrived in their new home, and territory had been divided up. The decision had been made to merge The Light Valley Pack with The Swift River Clan, and the Tall Pines Pack with the Black Mountain Pack. Those alliances would hold up for generations. Everything seemed to be going perfectly... almost.

Inside her dugout den, Dusk Owl's body locked in spasms. Her back arched and tightened. Her legs flicked back and forth randomly. Her ears twitched, and her eyes suddenly flashed open. She groaned softly. It was becoming a burden to so much as dream. Her memories hit her at inconvenient moments, and they seemed to be worst as she slept. She slowly stood up and made her way outside. The sun was just beginning to rise. She frowned. None of the others would be awake yet. For a moment she fell to her haunches, staring out into the wilderness before she finally made up her mind.

Dusk Owl stood up and headed for the river. Perhaps some time alone would do her good... time to get away from the pack, away from the memories... Yes... That would do nicely.

Silver Leaf hadn't been able to sleep all night, though he had been busy hunting and could use a rest. He lay curled up, listening to the wind. In his tired but sleepless state, he didn't try to fight off the memories that danced in the forefront of his mind every night. Memories of days spent wandering, of conversations and laughter, of a she-wolf he'd thought of as a friend, originally. Not anymore. Dusk Owl... he murmured ever so softly, imagining the beautiful smile that gleamed from her sorrel maw when the worst of her memories left her alone for a while. A sigh escaped him and he attempted again to sleep, until a soft groan reached his ears. He looked up, alert, and spied Dusk Owl walking away from the pack dens briefly after. 

Unconsiously he left his den silently, not even thinking of anything but her. As he had in all recent days, he padded along as if he was her shadow, all the while wondering why she, too, was awake. When they had walked awhile in silence, and were far enough from the dens so they would not be heard, he spoke.
Dusk Owl...? Is everything... Silver Leaf knew he couldn't ask if everything was alright. Not with what she'd seen, and then relived in her memories. Words failed him, but he fumbled for them. I mean, not okay, though I wish you were...I just know, what with all your memories... Are you... mostly okay? His voice was hushed, nervous and his words were spoken rapidly. Feeling like he's said too much, and maybe disturbed her, he stopped walking and fell silent.

Dusk Owl had managed to reach the river by the time Silver Leaf caught up with her. She paused and turned back, listening to him. Despite her problems, she couldn't help but smile when he stumbled over his words. It had become increasingly common for him in recent days.

"I'm okay, Silver Leaf," she promised, "I was just... dreaming." She sighed as she lay down by the bank. "I wish Black Wolf would just let me return to sleep without dreams, without memories." She shook her head again and leaned down, gingerly lapping from the stream. She looked up at him. A smile formed on her features as with a single flick of her head she motioned for him to join her.

The whisper of a whine escaped him; he disliked the idea of her suffering from past pains. Silver Leaf trotted beside her and gently rammed her shoulder with his head, and smiled slightly. "I'm sure Black Wolf has his reasons...though i'd like to know why you have trouble resting as well." His eyes met hers and for a moment he stared, searching the depths of her eyes for a hint of the same caring he not knew he felt for her, caring beyond the fact that they were best friends. Then he caught himself, and turned back to the river. He lapped up a bit of water, then absorbed himself in staring at the water.

"Not all dreams are bad...are yours always? I know when I have bad dreams...they aren't memories, they're...possibilities. Things going wrong. Thankfully I don't...they aren't as bad as i'm sure yours are...but at least you don't see future terrors. At least you wake up knowing what you knew when you went to sleep. The events are happened...and no grieving or remembering will change that. I suppose that, well...that's something, isn't it?"He gave her a wry smile, then lay down beside her on the bank. His eyes watched the water, the grass on the opposite bank, anything away from his more immediate surroundings. He was her friend and had to be there for her as such.


ooc: I'm experimenting with different ways of dialogue/thoughts so..some (but hopefully few, far between, and non-confusing) changes might occur

Dusk Owl couldn't help but smile all the more as she listened to her friend. It was ironic. She found herself tortured by the past, and yet, he feared the future. It seemed she was in good company then. She slowly nodded at everything he said, and when it was done, she leaned close, briefly brushing her cheek against his.

"You know something, Silver Leaf?" she said, "You're a pretty wise wolf for your age." It was true enough. She couldn't change the past, and with her perfect memory she couldn't forget it or run from it, or change it, but at least everything was usually fine when she woke up, provided no one made her relive any of her memories. "I dream of the future... sometimes when I'm asleep... sometimes when I'm awake, but one benefit my memories have given me is that I can see how far we've come. I'm hopeful for the future, especially knowing that I have you to face it with me." She lowered her head again, placing it in her paws beside him.

As her fur brushed his, he tensed. As she spoke, Silver Leaf was silent as his heart leapt. He stared at the water, smiling slightly. "If i'm wise it's because you're brilliant, Dusk Owl. I'm pretty sure i've learned from you. I am glad you have hope,though, It seems like an easy thing to lose sometimes...and hope is...I suppose...doubled when shared." The smile lingered on his features, present as long as he was around her.

For a while, he fell silent again, watching the ripples. Then her sighed, and lay his head on his paws, eyes closed. "And...the future...what of it Dusk Owl? What hopes do you have?" He scarcely believed his own daring, couldn't watch her expression though he desperately wanted to, and was almost ashamed of his cowardice. He found courage in knowing that it was only to be sure that he could easily stay as a friend...if that was what she wanted.

Dusk Owl couldn't help but laugh. It was so absurd, the thought that she was brilliant. She didn't consider herself so. She remembered everything she learned and experienced, but she learned no more than the average wolf.

"Yes... hope is a wonderful thing to share," she agreed, nodding, "I suppose... I suppose I hope for the same things anyone does for myself. There are rumors... rumors that the packs might merge soon. I wouldn't mind remembering that... watching our numbers grow, and having more added to our number. And when that happens, I can settle down.. find a mate... have a family... maybe have a pup to pass on everything I know to... the same as Fire Wind passed everything he knew to me." She looked at him curiously. "What about you, Silver Leaf? What do you dream about? You must have something you want out of life."

Though a smile split his face as her bright laugh split the quiet night, His heart pounded as she spoke. Silver Leaf wondered if she could hear it. At her mention of a family, after the packs merged, he wasn't sure if he should be glad, or sad. Is it really just her rank that makes her think this? Or is no wolf in this pack, am I not.good enough for her?  "I?"

He raised his head, looked up at the skies, and let the vast number of stars overwhelm him. Feeling his heart rush, he closed his eyes and sent up a prayer.   
Black Wolf, let this not ruin everything.. Please. 

He sighed and lowered his head. With a  somewhat nervous smile, he turned to Dusk Owl. "I.. I want a happy life, I suppose. But.. Dusk Owl.. Why do you want to wait for your own happiness until after the packs are merged? You will remember it as well, and maybe better if you are happier. I want you to be happy.

The rapid and strained tone in which he'd spoken struck the young wolf in it's oddness. He fell silent again then spoke slowly, trying to calculate his words. Silver Leaf let his gaze,nervous and hopeful and yearning all at once, linger on her eyes. "Dusk Owl.. My dear friend..." Feeling daring, he licked her cheek gently. "I want you to be happy, more than anything. I...want to make you happy. Dusk Owl, I love you. Please.. If you want a mate...a family... You don't have to look farther than me. " 
Having spoken, he turned away. "Of course, if you would rather a mate from the pack after they merge, I would remain your devoted friend...or if it really just your rank, I will wait.. Anything..."

Dusk Owl was taken off-guard. She had expected something similar to what she'd spoken: a list of hopes and future dreams. What came instead stunned her into silence. She listened to him, unable to speak, staring into his eyes.

She took a few deep breaths, her eyes shifting one way and then another, but finally she smiled at him. She sat up and leaned close, gently licking his muzzle. "I had never thought-" she said softly, "We were such good friends, and I assumed that was all you intended. I love you too, Silver Leaf. I'll gladly be your mate." She shifted her body so that her flank gently rested against his, laying her head in his paws.

"I want to wait until the packs merge to start a family," she explained, "but I'll gladly be yours, right here, right now." She stared into the water now. Despite her troubled dreams, she knew at least her waking world could bring her happiness.. and that happiness would carry her through all the darkness she had ever, or would ever experience. Silver Leaf was her one bright spot... the one beautiful thing she could hold onto, until her end. That was all she needed.

As she fell silent and stared at him, his heart beat faster and he nearly panicked. Did I say too much? Will I lose her? Even as a friend?Her words drew his eyes back to her and as she leaned against him he nuzzled her and lay his head gently on hers, protectively. "I thought that's all you wanted, my friend, my love. " moving his head so that it was next to hers. "But everytime you told me of your bad dreams, it pained me and I wantes nothing but to help you. Everytime you smiled, it warmed my heart so that I was happy because you were. I realized I could live like that forever if it was what you wanted.. But somehow I hoped I could play a bigger part in your future.."
Silver Leaf smiled at her.

"We will watch the merging of the packs together, and I will be there through your bad memories. There have been hard days.. But it is just the last shadow before morning for us. " Struck by his fortune he grinned and exhaled toward her ear to tickle her. "My lovely Dusk Owl... I will be the best mate for you that I can..but you won't lose your playful friend either." He whispered both warmly and mischeviously.

OOC: Unless you want to extend this, I think this thread has served it's purpose.

She listened to him for a time, smiling at his words. So wise... so unlike the playful friend she knew and had come to love. It was silly really, that he'd taken so long to approach her about this, but she neglected to tell him so. It didn't matter. They were both still young, and they had bright futures ahead of them.

She giggled at his final statement however. "I hope not," she said, turning to gaze at him, "You've always been a silly, immature wolf, Silver Leaf... and I wouldn't have you any other way." She licked at his cheek and suddenly stood, diving into the river, splashing him in the process. She came up from beneath, her fur soaked clean through, but she looked quite pleased with herself. If nothing else, Silver Leaf's proposal had brought her out of her momentary depression. "Of course, if you really want to be my mate, you'll have to catch me!" she decided, winking as she ran down along the bank.

"Hey! Silly, sure, but I can be mature! Though...of course..if that's what you want!" He barked a laugh and grinned, shaking his fur, as she pounced into the water. He sighed, still grinning, as she looked at him from the river, soaked and happy.

No sooner had she offered the challenge to catch her, than he called "Than catch you I shall!" and was off into a lope after her. Within moments it was evident his momentary seriousness had been even more lost to his natural light heart and clumsiness as an attempt to leap over a log send him sprawling. "Ugh...this is why i'm a pup-sitter, not a hunter. " He groaned before remembering Dusk Owl again, which led him back into a smile and a run. Paying more attention to where he put his feet soon brought him nearly in each of her tail, and he jumped forward, hoping to catch the speedy she-wolf and not land in the river or the dirt. It was likely he'd miss, but a chance he was willing to take. Not like he couldn't, or wouldn't, get back up if he missed.

Dusk Owl paused to look back, laughing as she saw her new mate stumble. She shook her head. Silver Leaf had always been sweet, but grace wasn't his strong point. "It's a good thing Running Wind didn't see you do that!" she grinned, "You know he'd never let you hear the end of it!"

She dashed off again, but her momentary pause had been enough. She yelped as she felt him catch hold of her tail and rear haunches. Soon enough she was brought down to the ground, but she laughed all the way

She looked back at him and grinned. "Okay, so you caught me."

Silver Leaf blinked in surprise, then started wagging his tail. "Indeed I did!" He moved his paws slightly so that he was both refusing to let her go and hugging her. "Speedy, but no match for my love!" He barked a laugh then gently nuzzled her side, laying his head down and looking up at her.

"Do you feel better Dusk Owl? I..I don't want to leave your side for anything, but sleep....sleep is good. " He smiled. "My only regret is that my den isn't big enough for both of us...yet. I suppose i'll just have to enlarge it tomorrow. I can probably get some of the half-grown pups to help."

Dusk Owl lay down next to Silver Leaf and smiled. He was so sweet in his way, and so childish at times it was almost irritating, but it was cute too. She closed her eyes, deciding that perhaps he was right. Perhaps sleep would be best for her.

"I feel much better," she smiled finally, "We can sleep here tonight... Before you go enlarging the den, perhaps you should speak to my father, let him know what we intend... He's been protective of all of us, but me especially since he lost Mother. It'd to him good, I think, to know someone like you is taking care of me."

Silver Leaf chuckled softly, and stood up just long enough to lie down beside her instead of hugging her feet. He lay his head on her neck and sighed, content. " Sleeping here sounds good." At the mention of her father, he winced. "I suppose I'm just happy, to forget something like that. Of course, i'll talk to him first thing tomorrow, Dusk Owl. I could never expect him to be anything but protective...and you..." He nuzzled her neck and smiled. "You're so worth protection...you all are...but you...you're a wonder. I hope he does approve, and I'd feel wonderful if our being together made your father feel better." Silver Leaf smiled and sighed again, happily inhaling her scent.
"Good night, my Dusk Owl, my love. I'll be here to chase your nightmares away."

The next thing Silver Leaf knew, it was morning and he had a slight breeze keeping them cool from the balmy sunshine. He stood up, careful not to disturb Dusk Owl, and stretched silently. In case any other wolf decided to wander over before he got a chance to talk to Pine Raven and get his approval, the young male lay a few feet from her and let his head rest on his paws. A smile crept on his face as he remembered their conversation the night before, and saw how beautiful she was in the morning sun.


ooc: Firestorm, you hadn't replied so I jumped ahead, just a bit, in case Merc wanted to join in.

(it turns out I still play Pine Raven : D; )

Getting old was tough on a wolf; years of running, fighting, and hunting resulted in joints wearing down, muscles becoming weaker, and old injuries flaring up and causing aches and pains.

Fortunately, Pine Raven was always a healthy wolf, despite the trauma of the loss of his mate and living through the fires and war, and this carried on through his older years. He was still able to walk and occasionally give a good run when called for although he could not . What was more youthful was his mind; he was as witty and patient as ever.

His ruddy fur, only slightly peppered with greying fur, was the only indication of his form, he curling up into a tight ball when sleeping. He slept in a den of his own but close enough to others his own age to keep him company. Despite considering searching for a new mate, he simply could not betray the love that left him in death. He had a duty, after all, to watch over his pups Aspen and Dusk Owl; that was a full-time job in itself.

The morning warmth and light streamed in to the den, but the older wolf was slower to get up. He woke, but only lifted his head a little, grinning a wily grin and only opening his eyes enough to check to dangers in his den.

"Come on, love," he grumbled to her spirit (he was convinced she followed him), "Just a little longer."...

Reluctant as he was to leave Dusk Owl out in the forest, Silver Leaf was well aware that she could take care of herself. After minutes spent simply watching her he stood up, stretching his sleepy limbs. His eagerness to simply be able to call his dear friend his mate made him both excited and anxious, quite unwilling to sit any longer. He could be speaking to her father, he could be digging a den. As soft as he could, Silver Leaf nuzzled Dusk Owl and licked her cheek, before turning toward the main den area. 

Every few steps he'd turn back, more protective than he'd ever been of his friend and love, until she was nearly out of sigh behind brush. Then he began to lope to the dens. Reaching them, he found a tree close to Pine Raven's den, and lay in the shade. He rested his head on his paws, and waited for the elder wolf to appear. In the summer sun it was all he could do to keep from drifting off.

Finally, the sun got so hot on his back that the old wolf could not just lie there anymore. He lifted his head, eyes now fully open, and saw that there was someone outside of his den. This was not in itself surprising; many times older wolves or even hunters before leaving on a hunt would bask in the morning sun like lizards to warm their bodies.

This, however, was a younger wolf who had no need to 'warm up' before going to hunt or run... or be active...

After standing up and taking a long stretch both of his shoulders and hips, he shook out the sleepiness in his bones and gingerly stepped out f his earthen den. Pine Raven had to squint his eyes to see much of anything in the bright sun, but being an elder pack member he knew just about everyone by smell and just taking a whiff of the air he knew who was outside.

"Enjoying the weather, Silver Leaf?" he said warmly to the younger wolf. Taking in another draw of air, he noticed something... odd. There was the scent of Dusk Owl, his daughter, also on Silver Leaf. Well, there was no reason to jump to irrational conclusions...

"What can I do you for?"

"

Despite his earlier eagerness, at Pine Raven's voice Silver Leaf grew nervous. He smiled slightly, and wagged his tail in greeting. I bet I smell like Dusk Owl.. We have always hung out together but, never really touched. Sleeping alongside her... He stopped the thought and focused on talking to Pine Raven. 

"Good morning, Pine Raven. It's a lovely day, i've been up for a while already." Come on, Silver Leaf. Pine Raven's a friend, he won't bite you for loving his daughter. gathering his courage he took a deep breath, then boldly spoke. "Pine Raven, Dusk Owl has long been my dearest friend and I love her as more than that. I have asked her to be my mate and she has agreed, but it would mean so much to both of us if you would grant us your approval. I... I would do anything for her, for her happiness and well-being." 

Having said what he was there to say, he tried not to let his nerves show. Silver Leaf simply sat, watching the older wolf and trying to look like a respectable wolf and not the bumbling fool he sometimes felt like. Never have I felt more out of place. I don't deserve her, so I might as well try to live up to the fur I find myself if.

Well, this was certainly unexpected. Pine Raven wakes up expecting for this young wolf's query to be about hunting or for advice... not a mating proposal for his daughter. But... did he really not see this coming? He could not refuse to see that Silver Leaf and Dusk Owl had a strong bond as friends; maybe this was just the natural course of action they decided to take? His and Bright Lark's courtship was less of friendship and more of a growing to like and then love each other, so he could not as much relate to the story. What this old red wolf could relate to, however, were the feelings of affection and devotion. That was, after all, why he did not take another mate after Bright Lark perished.

He took a few steps towards the young wolf, sensing his nerves. Looking directly in his eyes, he eased a few feet in front of him. Silver Leaf seemed to know how protective he was of his daughters; he put up one heck of a fight with Aspen and even with Yanya growing up. But, age had a way of mellowing the temper...

"If it were my choice and decision, I would approve," he started, "I have seen since your puphoods that Dusk Owl and you have a strong bond with little to no ill will existing between you two. I know from what I see this is a mutual decision. I will speak with my daughter later to confirm this." His tone was stern, yet had a gentleness to it. Silver Leaf had to understand that Pine Raven did have concern for his daughters leaving him, after all.

"However, I want you to understand what it means to have a mate, to be the half of a whole," he continued, "Too many young ones I see run off to be mated only to hate the wolf they have agreed to support and spend their life with. Tell me, if she or you cannot produce pups, will you still love her? If you fight and quarrel, will you or her return to each other? What if she can no longer run, or even walk, or if you cannot and she must support you? When you and her grow old, will there still be that devotion there to guide each other into the darkness? Are you willing to make sacrifices for her, and accept that she may make sacrifices for you? In a mating, you must accept the pain with the pleasure, the loss with love. Can you do that?"

The last bit was rather personal to Pine Raven; he had lost his love much too soon and found himself a single father. His devotion to Bright Lark was to take care of his and her daughters. Silver Leaf had to accept whatever came his way with this mating; often there was sorrow along with the joy with loss of pups or arguments.

It was precisely this that had made Silver Leaf nervous; being put on the spot by Pine Raven. But it wasn't as if he was suddenly opposed to having Dusk Owl as his mate anyway. No matter what. Pine Raven couldn't be anything but concerned for his daughters. Thinking of Dusk Owl and their almost certain future, Silver Leaf imagined he would be protective of a daughter as well. The young wolf thought however, that as clumsy as his paws might make him...they were still paws that cared to be the ones trusted to take care of Dusk Owl. He exhaled, trying to calm his nerves, and stared just aside from Pine Raven's eyes so as to be confident but not challenging.

"I want to be with Dusk Owl to be with her, not for anything else. Would it be that having a family was impossible, it would leave me caring more for her though if she wants one I would devote myself to her and the pups. If anything happened that might mean loss came with such a gift, I would support her knowing it was so much more her pain...especially with her memory. If we fought I would bury my pride and crawl back to her. Should the gods leave her unable to walk or care for herself, for any reason, I would serve her as I was able. If it happened I needed help I would ask no more of her than she could comfortably offer. As her mate I would share her every sorrow and joy, gladly. I have as her friend, it would make me less than wolf to do anything less for my mate.

Silver Leaf bowed his head and closed his eyes for a moment, before looking up at Pine Raven directly. "If you believe time with turn my mind, turn down my request, because she deserves better. But I don't believe anything will convince me that the beautiful she-wolf, my puphood friend and your devoted daughter, will be second to anywolf for me. " He averted his eyes slightly again, for politeness. "I would sacrifice anything for her, if she chose to do the same for me I couldn't ask for anything else in the world. " The pause hung in the air as he waited for Pine Raven to speak.

Impressive answers from a young wolf, Pine Raven thought. He was expecting either a blubbering mess or for the young one to show more cowardice than he did. This was the type of wolf that he wanted to see his daughters fall in love with and them to romance; not some lazy, irresponsible, not devoted whelp. For this to happen, he thanked the Gods.

He relaxed, appearing more noticeably at ease, but still very much keeping control.

"Well, as I said before, this is not my decision to make," he replied plainly, "Although I fully approve; you are more than what I could have asked for from the Gods for my Dusk Owl... but I have to ask someone first."

He paused, taking in a deep breath of the warm air. A light breeze swept through the clearing, and the sun continued to beat down on both of the wolves' backs. Once the wind had stopped and the leaves and grass on the ground ended their rustling, the red wolf returned his attention to Silver Leaf.

"Lovely weather, isn't it?" he remarked casually, "You know, for moons after my Bright Lark left this world I tried to find her again. I pushed myself to become a better hunter, hovered over my daughters. But, nothing seemed to work to stop the pain of grief."

"One sunny summer day, not unlike this one, I realized something. She was with me all along, in every step I took, every breath... she was with me and intertwined in my soul. She was as much of me as I was her; now I see and feel her everywhere, including in this sun. She could not let you here to ask me for my permission to be mate to our daughter if it was not such a good day."

"She has given her blessing, and that is approval enough."

As Pine Raven relaxed, so did Silver Leaf. The young wolf smiled at Pine Raven's word's of approval and dipped his head in acceptance. Then he spoke of asking someone else.
At first, Silver Leaf was confused and curious, how could it be anyone but Pine Raven and Dusk Owl's decision? Perhaps the alphas, though that seemed odd. Then a peaceful breeze blew through the the clearing, and the younger wolf watched Pine Raven seem a bit more serene as the wind blew through his fur.

Patiently, and curiously, Silver Leaf listened. As Pine Raven spoke of Bright Lark, he slowly began to understand. Remembering the wind, he smiled, truly feeling like he'd felt his new mate's mother's presence...and blessing.

"It is surely the most wonderful thing for you to know your mate is only apart from you in body...I thank you...and Bright Lark...for your blessing and approval." Respectfully and calmly, though overjoyed, Silver Leaf bowed his head slightly before looking up with a smile. "Now, though i'd love to sit and chat when the possibility of your disapproval isn't hanging over my head quite like a mother bear, I must share the news with Dusk Owl. Would you like me to tell her you wanted to talk to her? I promised i'd not let her spend another night alone with her nightmares, so i'd like to enlarge the den today..."

His smile was still tentative, but he stood, waiting to dash off as soon as he knew if Pine Raven wished to speak with his daughter.

ooc: Hey, Firestorm? Hope you're watching this. Dusk Owl should probably make an appearance sometime soon.

"If you could tell Dusk Owl that I would like to speak with her, I would appreciate it," Pine Raven replied, sitting down. The older wolf was content, just happy that the younger was as happy about the occasion as he was. It was a sign to Pine Raven, along with his early decision to enlarge the den for the two of them, that he was serious about the decision. It was a good sign for the pack; he would love to hear the sounds of his grandchildren's paws on the dusty earth.

"You would be doing an old wolf a favor; she is faster than me now. I can hardly keep up with her," he chuckled. Well, he could never keep up with his children, even though he was a hunter and his pups were... well... pups. His energy did not match his childrens', not by a long shot. For this he was proud; their dynamism left one as an Alphess and other a skilled huntress who caught the eye of a young male.

"Tell her I will be by my den until the sun does not cast shadows," he said, "I need to warm myself before I head out for the day."